Do Not Assume

My husband was the kind of man that didn’t speak his feelings often. I asked about that. I reminded him that women like to hear pretty words from time to time.

He said anyone could say the words, but it was a person’s actions and how they treated and took care of you that spoke more than words. Therefore it was not necessary to say the words.

He also reminded me that he came home after work, helped around the house, handed me his paycheck every payday, and accepted what I gave him.

So no pretty words, but he was my husband for over fifty years. We raised four boys, my niece and our grandson.

When it was time for him to go home, he was surrounded by his sons, except the one we lost, 15 grandchildren, seven great-grandchildren, and a host of family and friends.

I didn’t get the pretty words, but I am proud he picked me to be his wife despite my reluctance to do so. That is a story for another time.

I feel blessed that the Lord selected Robert to be my husband and that I had the good sense to listen.

Don’t get me wrong. We did not have a perfect marriage. We had our share of arguments and disagreements like any other married couple. We made an effort not to argue in front of the kids, but sometimes we forgot in the heat of the moment, but we didn’t go to bed with anger between us.

Often I am asked how we stayed together for so long. Did others ever tempt us? I can only speak for myself. After the death of my firstborn son, we did separate for a while.

Be human; there were times when I looked while we were married but only looked. I did not act on that temptation because I knew what I had at home. During our separation, I tried dating three times. It didn’t feel right, so I gave up.

When we got back together, I was glad I had not gotten into a relationship with anyone. As for my husband, I can’t say. He never gave any reason to believe he had during our marriage or separation. I never asked him; he never asked me.

I had not intended to reveal so much information. I wanted to ask that you don’t leave those you love assuming you love them. Tell your loved ones and if you don’t know how to say the words, show them how much you love them through your actions. If they have a problem reading your efforts, give them a Hallmark card that shares your true feelings.

Until next time, stay safe and keep the faith.

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